


turning into dust

by weatheredlaw



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Degrading Memory, Dementia, F/M, Fanmix, Ficmix, Grief/Mourning, Red Lyrium
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-03
Updated: 2015-09-03
Packaged: 2018-04-18 19:25:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 840
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4717670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/weatheredlaw/pseuds/weatheredlaw
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>turning into dust (i could feel myself under your fate)</p>
            </blockquote>





	turning into dust

**Author's Note:**

  * For [vehlr](https://archiveofourown.org/users/vehlr/gifts).
  * Inspired by [And I Will Watch You Go](https://archiveofourown.org/works/4699901) by [vehlr](https://archiveofourown.org/users/vehlr/pseuds/vehlr). 



> I remembered, quite suddenly, that it was entirely appropriate to post fanmixes on AO3 after finding a really beautiful fanmix set in the Marvel Universe (if you're into steve/bucky and steve/peggy, please go check it out [here](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4703921). After remembering this, and after remembering I had so many beautiful textures and beautiful pictures, I decided to make a mix here. I highly recommend you read "And I Will Watch You Go" -- it's beautiful, sad, heartbreaking, elegant, and the prose floors me. I really hope you all enjoy the mix -- I love to make them, and I love every song on here.
> 
> [listen on spotify](https://open.spotify.com/user/12137076740/playlist/3YCHXQ8OBHxqixjsIXzSn2)  
> [listen on youtube](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLMbQeINN77IbDNyQ-Oz54oTigjpwi1c4Q) (missing "the water's fine" by wendy colonna)  
> listen on 8tracks (COMING SOON)

  
  
  
  


* * *

into dust -- **mazzy star**  
i'm here, i'm not here -- **julia stone**  
the water's fine -- **wendy colonna**  
sea of love -- **cat power**  
believers -- **handsome ghost**  
wondering how -- **pieta brown**  
undertow -- **ane brun**  
afraid of the dark -- **phildel**  
between -- **vienna tang**  
how long will i love you -- **ellie goulding**

 

 

**"into dust" -- mazzy star**

_i could possibly be fading_  
_or have something more to gain_  
_i could feel myself growing colder_  
_i could feel myself under your fate_

 

 

"I'm sorry," he whispers. "Maker, Cassandra, I'm sorry -"

"For what?" she whispers back. "You have done nothing wrong."

"I've been so _angry_ with you -"

"Oh, Varric." She smiles, soft and warm. "Do not dwell on that. Now we know. We understand. We can begin to work together on this."

His fingers slide through her hair. "You don't have to -"

"If you finish that sentence, I will strangle you," she murmurs darkly. "I am with you, Varric. I will not walk away from you, not today, not tomorrow, not ever." Her own hand comes up to brush his cheek. "You will _never_ be alone. I promise you that."

**"i'm here, i'm not here" -- julia stone**

_i'm here, i'm not here_  
_there's nothing that i know for sure_  
_you're here, you're not here_  
_how long can this all go on for_  
_oh, i don't know_

 

 

**"the water's fine" -- wendy colonna**

_close your eyes, i'll take it nice and slow_  
_remind you of a world we used to know_  
_when love was just a mystery_  
_we hoped someday we'd find_  
_come on in, the water's fine_

"Would you have me, my love?"

Varric takes a deep breath, and she can feel him trembling slightly. Her fingers thread through his hair as she presses soft kisses to his cheek. He chuckles weakly, and she smiles as his lips find hers.

"I would be honoured,” he says softly, “to become Varric Pentaghast."

She nudges him, laughing. "You ass."

"Should I ask Curly for permission? Get Ruffles to announce it from the battlements? Do I have to adopt any of your other names?"

She pushes him back against the bed, laugh clear and sweet. "Do not mock me, dwarf!"

"I'm just saying, Varric Allegra rolls off the tongue quite nicely."

 

 

**"sea of love" -- cat power**

_come with me my love_  
_to the sea_  
_the sea of love_  
_i want to tell you_  
_how much i love you_

**"believers" -- handsome ghost**

_i don't wanna believe if it;s crumbling_  
_if you wanna connect i am listening_  
_will you meet me there we've been deep underneath_  
_aren't you done with the scene don't you want to believe_  
_we could be more than believers_

 

 

The garden becomes her refuge.

The ground had been hard and cold when they had first moved in, but on his more turbulent days she had ended up taking herself outside and tending to the soil – idleness did not sit well with her. By the end of the season, the seeds begin to sprout.

She likes to watch new things grow.

**"wondering how" -- pieta brown**

_after, after all this time_  
_i've been doing cartwheels in my mind_  
_right here, back then_  
_wondering how, how do i start over again?_  
_when this isn't even over yet?_

 

 

**"undertow" -- ane brun**

_i must follow_  
_these movements wherever they go_  
_i must follow_  
_these movements wherever they go_  
_i'm caught in your undertow_

**"afraid of the dark" -- phildel**

_resisting your soul is walking a tightrope_  
_the distant sound of dangerous ground: wolves are calling_  
_and i was never afraid of the dark_  
_no, i was never afraid until you_  
_oh, the weapon you make of my heart_  
_and it's true_

 

 

"Huh." He grins, that familiar twist of lips, and she turns away, the tears forming in her eyes.

"There is tea, if you are thirsty."

"I'm good. Might just go and lie down again, actually. But thanks, Legs," he adds, turning away. "Tell Hawke I owe her one, alright?" And he shuffles back into the bedroom, door closing behind him.

She manages to wait until she has stepped out into the garden before she breaks down, silent sobs that ache as she slides down the wall.

_No. No, not like this._

 

 

**"between" -- vienna teng**

_there once was a time i was sure of the bond_  
_when my hands and my tongue and my thoughts were enough_  
_we are the same but our lives move along_  
_and the third one between replaces what once was love_

**"how long will i love you?" -- ellie goulding**

 _how long will i love you?_  
_as long as stars are above you_  
_and longer if i can_  
_how long will i need you?_  
_as long as the seasons need to_  
_follow their plan_

 

 

"He loved you very much. Please remember that, Hawke."

Hawke's arm wraps around the Seeker, a soft kiss to her temple. "He loved you with every fibre of his being, Cassandra. And he always will."

The sun warms her skin as the words warm her heart, and Cassandra Tethras-Pentaghast breathes deep, spirit light. "And I him. Always."


End file.
